Day 6: My dreams of Epic Mealtime gorging

Day 6

This was a day that I almost cheated.  I almost had my full blown, carb out, deep fried Cadbury egg milkshake day.  I almost did it but then something happened, I went to the scale.  The scale said I was losing weight.  The scale showed me that I was actually making progress.  Damn you, you stupid scale I wanted to eat crap all day but now I feel to freakin’ guilty to do it.  I was even at Walgreens staring at the Cadbury display, but I just couldn’t do it. 

I’m not eating like crap and I’m not starving myself either.  I’ve found a semi-balance of grilled chicken, canned tuna, steamed shrimp, and an assortment of veggies have nearly left me satisfied for the moment.  On top of that, it is now starting to yield results.  I’m allowed a cheat day but I may put it off for a couple more days until I’ve reached some sort of acceptable goal.  I think 10 lbs. is a pretty solid start, so that is what I am aiming for.  The problem with that goal is that I’m not 100% sure what weight I started out at.  We live in a house that is about as level and symmetrical as a Jackson Pollack painting and this causes our scales to spit all kinds of crazy numbers at us.  So I started somewhere between 310 and 300, so I guess I’ll call my starting weight 305.  When I weighed on day 6, the scale said 297.  Like I said, for all I know I could weigh 290 but when you are as a big of a mammal as I am, what does it really matter?  So I think my binge/cheat day will be when I see it at or below 295 preferably 290. 

I hate that I can watch one of the Epic Mealtime videos and notice that not one of them is really all that overweight.  The main guy looks big but he is just tall, he doesn’t have a gut or anything.  How the hell do they do that?  That would be my dream, on my binge day I get to hang out with the Epic Mealtime guys (if you haven’t seen any of their videos just go to YouTube) and gorge myself.

So that’s about it for day 6:

·         I fought the urge to pound Cadbury Eggs

·         The scale guilt tripped me

·         My sad dream is to hang out and eat with YouTube “stars” and gorge myself.